Flip that State! (I hope the Russians Love Our Children Too)

30Sep08

 

Let’s face it:  the Bush-Paulson Wall Street bailout plan is simply not palatable, and Congress is not going to let it pass.  One solution that no one has discussed but which would automatically solve our financial problems is to sell Alaska back to the Russians for $700 billion.

Considering the initial purchase price from the Russians in 1867 of $7.2 million (or around $100 million in today’s dollars), a profit of around 70,000% would be considered a financial and investment success by any measure.

It wouldn’t be a complete steal for the Russians, because, with a GDP of only $40 billion, the value of Alaska into perpetuity is roughly only $440 billion in today’s dollars.  It is probably even less when you consider that we are at peak oil and that melting glaciers will soon kill tourism dollars.  But – and Republicans will be ecstatic to hear this – the Russians would probably have no qualms about drilling in ANWR in order to increase the GDP of Alaska and make the deal pay off.  With oil from ANWR adding to the global supply, it would have the added benefit of reducing prices for the American consumer.

The downside is that we would no longer would be able to rely on Alaskans to, in the words of Sarah Palin, “any eye is being kept on [Russia] . . . [when] Putin rears his head.”  But there is always Washington State, with a host of military installations ready to defend the country.

On the bright side, Mrs. Palin would not even need to leave her home to see a foreign country, because she would live in a foreign country.  

 

As for having to change the U.S. flag to accommodate only 49 stars, you ask?  Abate your worry:  we’ll just annex Iraq. 

Contribution by Eric Z. Adler

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Tags: alaska, bailout, sell alaska, solution, wall street